Conversing with Edward Elric himself
by TheGreatElisaMousy
Summary: Everyone wants to talk to Ed. Now you can! Simply send in a review, or PM me, I'll relay the message to Ed, and he'll reply. IT'S THAT EASY!
1. Introduction

**People always want to talk to Ed, right? Well, now you can! Just review or PM me, I'll send the message to Ed (I know him PERSONALLY!!!), and he'll reply within the next chapter! Isn't that amazing!**

Elisa: Now, over to Ed.

Ed: Hi. I'm Ed.

Elisa: (whispers) They know that, dummy.

Ed: DON'T CALL ME SHORT!!!

Elisa: *sweatdrops* I didn't. You overreact too much.

Ed: Right… Anyway, can't wait to hear from you guys!

Elisa: Remember, review, and you have the pleasure of Edward replying! YAY!

Ed: I didn't think you were that much of a fangirl.

Elisa: I'm not, but someone's got to do it, and Asile's not here.

Ed: You rock, people!

Elisa: Where the heck did that come from?

Ed: *hands her notecard* Dark wrote this and gave it to me.

Elisa: *sighs* As you can tell, we're just rambling this chapter.

Ed: Yeah, pretty much.

Elisa: I've got a couple questions for you.

Ed: Yeah? Like what?

Elisa: Nevermind… Let's let your fans ask those questions.

*both hear chainsaw*

Elisa: Asile, PUT THE CHAINSAW DOWN!!!

Asile: But I want to have automail…

Elisa: *smacks her over the head* You dummy!

Ed: Was that a smart idea? She's holding a chainsaw, you know.

Elisa: Oh… Alchemical… Crap.

Asile: MWAHAHAHA!

Elisa: Run!

Ed: No kidding.

**Don't forget to review! And keep that psychotic child away from me!**


	2. Milk, Copycats, and Guests!

**People always want to talk to Ed, right? Well, now you can! Just review or PM me, I'll send the message to Ed (I know him PERSONALLY!), and he'll reply within the next chapter! Isn't that amazing!**

Elisa: So, Ed, how are you feeling about getting three letters?

Ed: Well, it's been about five months, so I'm a little disappointed.

Elisa: Anyway, here's our first letter from Asile Hikari… wait a minute… ASILE! What did I tell you about writing to us?

Asile: … Not to...

Elisa: And you did it… why?

Asile: … I wanted to make Ed drink milk.

Ed: WHAT?

Elisa: It's true. That's all she said is, 'Can I make Ed drink milk'.

Asile: *holds milk glass with evil grin* Come drink your milk, Ed!

Ed: AHHHHHHHHHH!

Asile: *force feeds Ed*

Ed: *gags* I'm dying! DYING!

Elisa: Okay, Drama Queen, we get it. Next is from my close friend, The Foreseer of Avalon. What does she have to say?

**Ok heres the first letter-**

So Ed I can't understand who the copycat is, you or me? Cuz we both braid our in exactly the same way! btw wat do u have 2 study to be an alchemist?

Ed: Oh… well… I dunno. Depends on how long you've been putting your hair up like that. I started when I was twelve. So… maybe it was you, maybe it was me. For all we know, it could be some random person in Zimbabwe.

Elisa: Why Zimbabwe?

Ed: It's fun to say, that's why. Anyway, it takes a lot of hard work, Foreseer. Alchemy is a difficult form of science. Maybe you could join my class at Hogwarts?

Elisa: Yeah, that's from my story 'Alchemy at Hogwarts'. Last, but not least, we have a letter from AmarantineOct.3'11. Let's see what they have to say, shall we?

**Oh my GOD! I wanna talkto to Ed! Hi Ed! Anyway, I gotta question for you, Ed. If you had to date one person, any person, that you know(boy or girl D), who would it be?**

Ed: Uh… hi? Huh, if I had to date someone… wait! Let me set this straight right now! I'M NOT GAY! ALL THE OTHER GUYS ARE IDIOTS! AND WHOSE BRIGHT IDEA WAS IT TO PAIR ME WITH ENVY, HUH?

Elisa: Calm down, shortie.

Ed: WHO'REYOUCALLINGSOSMALLHE'SSHORTERTHANHISYOUNGERBROTHER?

Elisa: Ah… so funny. Good midget.

Ed: Grrrr….

Elisa: Oh yeah! You still have to answer the question!

Ed: … *mumbles*

Elisa: What was that?

Ed: *mumbles*

Elisa: I can't hear you!

Ed: FINE! Maria, happy?

Elisa: … you're in love with the heartless mercenary?

Ed: Why are you twisting my words? I SAID, if I _had_ to go out with anyone, it'd be Maria. But only 'cause she doesn't try to kill me WITH A WRENCH I BOUGHT HER!

Elisa: And what'll you do if she does?

Ed: Hey! I don't have to answer to you!

Elisa: Haha! You do like her!

Ed: Do not!

Elisa: Do too!

The Foreseer of Avalon: Uh, guys… Asile's trying to cut her arm off again…

Elisa: Hey! Can you do your cool Mage powers? Please?

The Foreseer: … Okay. *does epic air magic power things*

Elisa: YAY! The chainsaw has been destroyed!

Ed: Um… Elisa?

Elisa: Huh?

Ed: She has a lawnmower and a spiky hula hoop.

Elisa: *turns* You stole that from Tira, didn't you?

Asile: Uh… maybe…

The Foreseer: Because Asile is getting beat up by Soul Caliber characters, Ed finally passed out from the milk, and Elisa is holding off the fangirls, I suppose I'll say it this time. Send in the reviews and we hope to see you next time!


	3. Milk again and a very angry palm tree

**People always want to talk to Ed, right? Well, now you can! Just review or PM me, I'll send the message to Ed (I know him PERSONALLY!), and he'll reply within the next chapter! Isn't that amazing!**

Elisa: Hey, everyone, we're back! Only three months, this time!

Ed: *sarcastically* Whoo.

Elisa: Our first letter is from RenofAmestris. Here's what they have to say:

**Okay,Edo-chan,i have 2 questions.1)what would you do if Al died?2)if you ran into Roy and for some reason he shrunk and now your taller than him what would your reaction be?too bad that wont happen huh shrimp?3...2...1-**

Ed: Who'?

**-insert rant:)**

Elisa: Perfect timing, midget!

Ed: Grr…

Elisa: Just answer the dumb questions!

Ed: Okay, um… First, I'd track down the person stupid enough to kill my little brother, then I'd hunt down their family, and then I'd come after YOU for suggesting something like that.

Elisa: Geez, overkill, much?

Ed: Anyway… If Roy shrunk, huh? Well, he'd be flipping out, and I'd be laughing… then I'd probably start calling _him_ short. HAHAHAHA!

Elisa: You're still a midget, midget. And RenofAmestris has a point: that will _never_ happen.

Ed: Grr…

Elisa: Anyway, next letter, from The artist chibi:

**Ed! hi! I have a question for ya if you were to choose between dying or drinking milkcwhat will it be? :)**

Ed: Dying or milk? THEY'RE THE SAME FREAKIN' THING!

Elisa: Dude, calm down. It's just a liquid that comes out of a cow's reproductive organs.

Ed: Ewww…

Elisa: Get your head out of the gutter! From KuroTenshiAkuma:

**OMG I WANNA DO THIS!**

all right i got one question and one question only: (for now X3)

Edward Elric, you are the love of my life in this troubled teen years. Will you marry me?

That is all. :P

Ed: *twitch twitch* Um… marry…? Isn't that a little, uh, I dunno, weird? So, uh… I'm gonna have to say… No.

Elisa: *slaps him* You have no feelings!

Ed: WELL EXCUSE ME FOR HAVING NINE KIDS WITH ONE OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS!

-silence-

Elisa: Oh, yeah…

Ed: Isn't there another letter or something?

Elisa: Oh, yeah! You're gonna LOVE this! From The Foreseer of Avalon:

**That was a cool chapter! :)**

So Ed because you hate milk *hands ed 2 barrels of milk* you get to flood Envy's room with it!

Ed: Hehehe… I like you, Foreseer, you're _really _awesome.

-Story time ;p-

Ed snuck around the back of the mansion the Homunculi lived in. That was sort of hard to do, however, considering he had two barrels of milk in his arms. All of a sudden, a head of VERY messy dark hair appeared in front of him. Looking up, Ed saw the ADD Homunculus, Wrath, hanging from a pipe.

"What are _you_ doing here, pipsqueak?" Wrath asked, and began poking the barrels. "And what're those?"

"They're barrels of milk, and I'm going to flood Envy's room with them. Got a problem with that?"

Wrath smirked. "I don't. He might, though…"

Wrath was so for the idea, that he even led Pipsqueak – I mean Ed – to Envy's room. "And here it is." He said. "I, however, will not be responsible for the loss of any limbs and/or lives. Okay?"

Ed, rolling his eyes, dumped the barrels in the room as he opened the door. Milk kept coming out (probably because of the Foreseer's magic) until it filled the room, but it didn't spill out.

Unfortunately for Ed, there was an Envy in the room.

Twitching with anger, the green haired Homunculus turned to Ed, and yelled: "PIPSQUEAK!"

That was the poor Ed's cue to run.

-Back to the studio-

Elisa: Oh, god that was funny! Go, pipsqueak, go! And even more importantly, CATCH THE MIDGET ENVY!"

Envy: *still chasing Ed* Just wait, you're next!

Elisa: EEP! Don't blame me, it was the Foreseer's idea! Go after her! Crap… RUN, FORESEER, _RUN!_

**Review please, or I will send a very angry, milk-drenched Envy after you.**


End file.
